today's nervous day & chocolate

so nervous today..why?? i actually have a meeting with my so-called co-sv from india, he just came back here for 12 weeks, and of course he kind of has a high expectation on me...but actually that's what i feel about him..



when i arrived at uni, at the first place i just want to pretend that i don't have to see him today, but my instinct keep saying " call him call him, have a meeting with him.." and i did.



i called him and arrange a meeting at 11am together with my sv, prof mike. i showed him what results i got from several preliminary measurements i've made, and still i am like don't know how to explain things in order, i can feel like i am jumping here and there, and when i glanced at his face, OMG!!..i know he kind of confuse/blank/blurr of what i am presenting to him.



Luckily i manage to get something printed on so he can study it by himself instead, and the meeting last away to early than i expected..its only takes about 20 minutes..and when i stepped out of the room, my mind keep thinking, is this enough? is this okay? or are they thinking something bad and saying bad things about me after i left ?



he gave me some work to do and tomorow i have to show him what i've done, hopefully tomorrow will be better, i kept imagine banging my head to my table while saying "stupid stupid stupid of me", after the meeting because i can't even remember the most easiest formula which i used it a lot in my calculation, and i must say, i felt stupid, very stupid at that time when he asked me what formula did i use to calculate that graph...ish ish ish..terrible!



anyway, my sv helped me out sometimes, he knew it when i don't know how to respond and he helped me explain it back to me or explained to him...my co-sv, his ascent sometime not so clear, and i need to really pay attention to his mouth to know what he is saying..haha



and the best part ever today is that, i read an article about phd journey again today ..(check at "check it out" segment on the right)..and at one part the author said something that chocolate can really make us forget about stress and chocolate can stimulate us to be more cheerful and give our best effort in work..take chocolate while doing phd might help to reduce your phd stress...really???



walllahhh, i like that very much, in fact yeaa, now i realise why i am being soo moody lately, ...i need chocolate..i need it desperately..i need it nowww...